Sweetest Sleep

Jasper's naps regularly most of the time, but he sleeps the longest when he's in my arms (or in Nick's.) We mostly put him down to sleep, but sometimes having him next to me while I read or watch something online is delicious. He is so sweet, lightly breathing, still enough for me to study his face and note how quickly he's becoming a boy. 

Today's been a good nap day, though he woke after 45 mins this am and slept another hour in my arms, and he's in my arms sleeping as I type this with my left hand. He'll probably sleep another 30 mins...giving me a total of 3.5 -4 hours of nap. Experts tell me that the better he sleeps during the day, the better he'll sleep at night. So, how do I translate this to sleeping on his own? I know he's capable. Am I even ready for it? I enjoy the sleeping time with my son, I like the bond it's created between us.

Another factor is nursing. He still eats a lot at night, and, I intuit that his night nursing will lessen once his day time eating increases. I don't want to struggle with weaning and food, I want to keep these things intuitive and natural. He's begun to take more interest in eating his food when we let him self feed and make a mess in the process. It's gratifying for both of us. What's a little more mess to clean up everyday..it's temporary, so let it go. With food, I find myself so focused on preparing his that I slip on my own good eating habits. I need to find balance with making my eating more healthful to match my choices for Jasper. 

And then their is our marriage. We've really struggled with finding our way together into parenthood, and I doubt it will ever be perfect. But our new identity and roles has taken a huge chunk out of "our relationship." Which, I know, those same experts warn against. Our lives have become parallel as we take turns parenting while the other one works. Sometimes I hardly know how to have a real conversation that goes beyond what Jasper did and what bills need to be paid.